tinkerbitchx's Diaryland Diary

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private hell

My eyes are so full of this blackness. It's rather messy. Certain things might let my mind trail off of the real pain inside for a while. Sooner rather than later the screams come charging back. Taking me away once again. Notice I'm not talking in third person? Either way nothing can reel me out. I'm so fucking tired. But of what? I've done nothing all day but sit around here and think about it all. Let it get to me. Let it eat at my very own flesh. That's it. And I wish the rain would come. Not because I think it will wash away all my problems because it wont. I just want to drown in it is all. Fall asleep with the drops beating on my skin in some attempts to comfort me as the small pool suddenly grows, taking away my air supply. I wouldn't sit up, not for a second. Not even if I saw you through the water standing there. That would lead to more endless days of feeling .. exactly .. like .. this.

2:32 pm - 03-13-03

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